Mystery of the Missing Pads …An Unexpected Twist
For months, I genuinely thought I was losing my mind. Every time my period rolled around, I’d reach into the bathroom drawer and find just enough pads missing to make me question myself. Did I use more last month? Forget to restock? Was I sleepwalking?
I even asked my sister once when she stayed over for the weekend — half joking, half not — if she’d “borrowed” any. She looked at me like I’d grown two heads. “Why would I? I have my own.” So that theory died fast.
Weeks went by, and the mystery kept nagging at me. At one point, I even checked the apartment for signs of… I don’t know, a menstruating raccoon? That’s how unhinged I felt.
Then yesterday happened.
I came home early because a meeting got canceled. As soon as I walked in, I heard this frantic rustling in the bathroom — someone clearly scrambling. Then my boyfriend’s voice, panicked and whispering, “Crap, crap, crap…”
Naturally, I thought something was wrong. I rushed over and pushed the door open.
And there he was.
My boyfriend, sitting on the bathroom floor like a kid caught doing something forbidden. In his hands was one of my pads — opened perfectly, sticky side up — and he was pressing it firmly into his armpit.
We both froze. Ten full seconds of absolute silence.
Finally, I managed, “What… are you doing?”
He blinked at me, exhaled like he’d been hiding a state secret, and said — completely sincere — “They’re perfect for soaking up sweat at the gym.”
I just stared. My brain genuinely stalled.
Then he launched into a full explanation: the adhesive keeps it in place on the inside of his shirt, it absorbs sweat better than anything he’s tried, and he didn’t want to “waste them” so he only took one or two at a time. It was basically a TED Talk on menstrual-product innovation.
So yeah. Mystery solved.
My boyfriend has been using my pads as armpit sweat absorbers.
I still can’t tell if I’m horrified, impressed, or about to start charging him for supplies.
You’ve just read, Mystery of the Missing Pads. Why not read Manager Had To Hire A New Employee.