After Babysitting My Grandson My DIL Handed Me a Bill for ‘Living Expenses’
The text from Brittany, my daughter-in-law, buzzed in just as I was refilling the hummingbird feeder, fingers sticky with sugar water.
“Hey, would you mind staying with Noah for the weekend? Ethan has a work retreat and I have a spa trip planned with my sister.”
I was surprised. Brittany and I had never quite clicked — her ideas about boundaries reminded me of the Berlin Wall. But I didn’t hesitate. I love every second with my grandson.
“Of course,” I replied.
“Everything you need will be ready,” she promised.
When I arrived Friday, the house looked like a toddler hurricane had hit. Toys everywhere, dishes piled high, a pan fossilizing on the stove.
“Grahma!” Noah ran to me, diaper sagging, arms wide. I scooped him up as Brittany wheeled by with her suitcase.
“There’s food in the fridge, Noah’s stuff is in his room… you’ve got this,” she said, kissing him on the head before heading out.
She was gone before I could reply.
After Noah settled with his blocks, I went to make coffee — and discovered the fridge contained half a carton of eggs, no bread, and borderline milk.
Then I checked his room. Five diapers. No wipes.
I was irritated. Then I was mad. But I got resourceful.
I cleaned him up with a lavender washcloth (sorry, Brittany), did a quick load of laundry, then packed him into the car for a supply run.
$68 later, we had diapers, wipes, groceries, and a stuffed elephant Noah fell in love with at the checkout line.
The weekend was a joyful blur: baking cookies (sprinkles everywhere), cracking eggs (mostly on the counter), playground trips, bedtime stories, and whispered giggles under a blanket watching Finding Nemo.
Each night, after Noah fell asleep, I stayed up scrubbing the house. It felt good to create peace for him in the chaos. I even made a casserole for Brittany.
By Sunday night, I was exhausted — and full of love.
Monday morning, I spotted a note on the counter. Pink ink. My name on it.
Expecting a thank-you, I opened it.
It was an invoice.
- Eggs: $8
- Water bottles: $3
- Washing powder: $5
- Electricity: $12
- Toilet paper: $3
- Laundry detergent $5
- Toothpaste: $4
Total: $40
“Please Venmo by Friday. Thanks!! ❤️”
I blinked. Then I laughed. Then I got mad again.
When Brittany returned, I didn’t confront her — I knew I’d explode. I smiled, said goodbye, and went home. Then I sat down at my laptop and typed:
Grandmother Services, Est. 1993
Raising One Fine Husband for You Since Day One
SERVICES RENDERED:
- 18 years of meals: 19,710 @ $5 = $98,550
- 18 years of laundry: 3 loads/week = $14,040
- Pediatric co-pays: $3,600
- Transportation: $5,220
- Counseling post-breakup: $1,125
- Tutoring & life advice: $15,000
- Emotional support: $65,700
Subtotal: $203,235
Family discount: –$203,195
Total due: $40
“Please deduct your original ‘invoice’ from this amount. ❤️ Thanks for understanding!”
I printed it on linen paper, sealed it in a gold-trimmed envelope, and dropped it in her mailbox the next morning.
Not an hour passed before my phone rang.
“Mom?” Ethan said, barely hiding his amusement.
“What did you do?”
“What do you mean?”
“Brittany is… upset.”
Turns out she hadn’t mentioned the invoice to him.
“I told her she deserved it,” he added. “We’ve been having talks about family and boundaries. This just brought things to a head. But Mom? That was some invoice.”
“I raised you, didn’t I?” I smiled. “I know how to stand my ground.”
A week later, while gardening, my phone buzzed.
Venmo: $40 from Brittany.
Note: To settle my debt. Please don’t charge me interest 😂
I laughed so hard the neighbor’s cat jumped.
That night, I donated the $40 to the local children’s hospital in Noah’s name.
Because you don’t beat pettiness with pettiness — you beat it with grace, glitter, and a spreadsheet.
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